15 Balou Place, Richmond, Richmond

A Castle for Someone With More Money Than Sense Every now and then, a property comes along that simply cannot be justified by logic, practicality, common sense or any reasonable assessment of ongoing maintenance costs. This is one of those properties. Set high in the hills, this extraordinary castle enjoys dramatic views, bitterly cold winters, wildly unpredictable conditions and the sort of isolation that will make you question almost every decision that led you here. It is magnificent. It is ridiculous. And we absolutely love it. Approaching the property, you’ll be welcomed by an impressive front lawn, sweeping grounds and, quite possibly, several living brown bears wandering about as though they own the place. They don’t, although attempting to explain that to them is entirely at your own risk. Inside, the castle offers all the things you would expect from a proper castle: enormous rooms, stone walls, endless corridors, places you could easily lose a child for several hours, heating bills that resemble the GDP of a small nation and approximately 400 things requiring immediate maintenance at any given time. This is not a lock-up-and-leave. It is barely a lock-up-and-survive. The climate is cold, the environment can be volatile and maintaining the property will almost certainly require a small army of tradespeople, groundskeepers, engineers, bear negotiators and someone whose sole responsibility is working out why water has suddenly started coming through a wall that has been standing perfectly happily for the last 300 years. Financially, owning it makes absolutely no sense. Which is exactly why the right buyer will want it. We’re looking for that rare individual who has already bought the beach house, the boat, the cars and perhaps an unnecessary helicopter, and is now searching for something considerably less sensible. Someone who sees a seven-figure maintenance programme and thinks, “That sounds manageable.” Someone who looks at a brown bear on the front lawn and doesn’t ask how to remove it, but whether there are more. Because for all its faults, this is an incredible place. It’s dramatic, beautiful, completely unforgettable and unlike almost anything else you could own. On a clear morning, standing above the surrounding hills with the castle behind you and the landscape stretching away below, there will be moments when you’ll understand exactly why somebody built it here. Then winter will arrive. If you’re looking for easy, economical or practical, please keep scrolling. If you’re looking for something extraordinary, wildly impractical and capable of swallowing enormous amounts of disposable income while providing one hell of a story, we may have found your next home. Serious buyers only. Bear experience preferred.